Having a Date with Me

Here I am again.  Blessed with another moment to take a little time out to reflect on the life that I've been given.  I was so anxious about the possibility of time and what direction it would go today. Ended up at one of my favorite spots-Borders Cafe, sippin on the best hot chocolate in town-the triple trio cocoa. White chocolate shavings, circles of milk chocolate sryup, and a mini dark chocolate bar all floating happily on whipped clouds of cream.  You know what I'm also realizing -I really like being with me. I love my man and my babies truly to the heart. I love my people, my girls, my family, all yall know I love you.  But I really, really love to be still, to feel the wind on my face, to hold the beauty of a leaf, a flower, the sky up close in full view.  Yeah.. in order to "become" you got to learn how to just be.   I hate always being in a rush.  It is not the way to start out your day. Today like usual started off in a hurry and in a  mess!! Literally the house was and is tore up, but this week I'm refusing to let it (the messes) get on the inside of me.Began reading in Galatians in The Message.  What stood out to me was the blessing of the man or woman who moves in accordance or direction to the life that God has mapped out for him/her.  Not one who sets out by manipulation, control, or fear but by faith and trust. So many times I'm running ahead, behind, or without you, slow me down Lord.

In the midst of it all my children were so jovial this morning, they are full of energy and wonder.  Sometimes I find myself just starring out them -wishing some of their zest for life will rub off on me. And if I slow down a little it usually does.

Like this morning
"You are holy, oh so holy, holy, so holy."  Nya begin serenading us over oatmeal and toast.Jalen couldn’t get enough giggling out of his system during devotion.Aliyah tried not to act like she wasn't getting her chuckles in also. We managed to get through our second day of our one year devotion that we started last week (go figure).

On the radio my new favorite family Doctor Kevin Lemann was on, talking once again about the family birth order and how that shapes our life.  Today in the 15 minutes that I had to listen in -the broadcast just happen to be about the tendencies of the first born. 

I admit I am a recovering firstborn.  I learned from Dr, Kevin that perfectionism will kill me excellence will propel me. The difference is excellence is based on the inside out"being the best at who I am",  perfectionism is based on the outside only "becoming who I think others want me to be" .

So I've been chosing these days to become excellent in taking care of me and my family first and maybe-just maybe that will be enough to spill out on to this world I tried for so long to conquer.

Today was an excellent day, I got a date with me, my husband gave me a good kiss before he left for work, my children got loved on even though my house didn't
And I've just decided that I'd rather keep my husband and children happy and have a tore up house than have a happy house and a broke down marriage and some tore up children.